Sunday, 20 May 2012



We went to After Hours last night and all of us lived our absolute BEST LIVES EVER.

"After Hours is actually just an orgy." - Ané.

What would have happened if everybody wasn't too drunk to fuck:

Matthew had a conceptual baby with Charlotte Free, called Babyhunk.

Isa and Roy's unacceptable lovechild, Isabaloo.

Patrick and Naama's tall and crazy Jewish surprise, Woody Allen.

Fabi and Nash's non-gay dream baby, M.I.A.

Jana and Mavuso's little Januso.

Post party discussions has opened our eyes to things we probably already knew in the back of our minds.

Here is a guideline to last night (life):

Patrick's type is tall & crazy, apparently.

People were throwing themselves at Phil, as per usual.

Coutts heard from "someone that used to DJ at Assembly" that they put acid in the aircons.  We tested it out and decided it's definitely true.

Patrick and Isa want to sue After Hours for getting burnt by the smoke machine.

"I want everyone to take their shirts off and wrap themselves in bubble wrap." - Isa.

Isa and Fabi got chest tattoos and dagger bindis just for last night to be in with the crowd.

Fabi and Isa love Phil & Kyle in a very gay way.

Kale thought Isa's name was Isabaloo.

Renee chipped her tooth and made everyone in the club feel it.

Nash isn't really gay, he's just pretending to be gay because it's cool to be gay in Cape Town.  He is actually the only non-gay man in Cape Town.

Johnny IS Kate Moss (Croydan facelift vibes).

"Are Ian and Ané dating?" - EVERYONE at Assembly.

"Is this the book where Harry and Ginny start hooking up? Do they bang?" - Isa
"I thought there was no sex in the wizard's world." - Fabi.

"I studied so much in grade 3 so I never had to study again for the rest of my school career." - Fabi.

Ian to some guy - "Thanks for coming man."
Some guy - "No, thank YOU! This is my birthday thing."

"I want to go to a skate park and find straight men." - Fabi

This is basically Cape Town:

Here's a picture Paul took at Assembly last night:


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