TONIGHT TONIGHT TONIGHT!
STELLENBOSCH ON CRACK!
Lauren Bristow is some next level kind of person. She is literally one of the craziest people that Jana and Ané know (Fabi isn't well acquainted with Lol, which is a shame because they'd get on just fine), yet she pretends to be very normal. If you've heard about the Italian man you will know that she is NOT NORMAL. She goes out and does what is pictured above. The one time Ané and her went out with Kirstin and Dante and they were doing these kind of activities, and then they fell on their heads and probably had concussions. Kirstin and Dante, out of the kindness of their hearts, went to buy Lauren and Ané pies and cokes to improve the quality of their lives and as they were walking back to Mystics to hand over the goodies, Lol and Ané drove off home, leaving K&D liftless. Lauren loves opera and her favourite movie and book ever is A Room with a View but #IJMS because young Helena Bonham Carter is obviously better than life itself. Tonight is Lauren's 21st birthday party in Stellenbosch and we already know it's going to be on crack. It's a punch party which is really the only kind of party that should be allowed in Stellenbosch. Some crazy shit has gone down in Stellenbosch in the past, from Jana breaking a wineglass in Bohemia so that Ané and her can cut their palms open and become blood sisters (they still bear the scars), to staying up until 7 in the morning watching Gummo in Megan's bed after a night out because bitches were too high on Hunters Extreme, to meeting an American boy and getting along with him SO WELL that they were surely soulmates, but then never hearing from him again, to photoboothing in the Caltex parking lot. That sentence was clumsy, sorry.
SOME PICTURES OF LAUREN AND HER AMAZING LIFE:
The most amazing New Years ever, on Megan's farm in Oudtshoorn:
This was the most stoned anybody in the world has ever been. We attempted going to Bohemia afterwards but no-one spoke to each other for half an hour and we decided to call it a night:
Her last birthday punch party: